allie weig
the journey of a pirate and his mom
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Month: February 2015

Like a good neighbor…

2 / 26 / 152 / 26 / 15
Erron hospital
Erron and I on our midnight rendezvous at the ER. He looks happy because the stone passed there and we were home in an hour.

A few nights ago Erron woke up  in serious pain at 1:30 am. It became obvious pretty quick that we would not be going back to sleep.  His kidney stones were back. After the last time, I learned to be more sympathetic, kidney stone are no joke, and it took less than 15 minutes before I decided to take Erron to the ER. I was in a bit of a crunch because there was ice and snow all over the roads. Our littles were tucked in their beds and our family was over an hour and half away in good driving conditions. So…I did the next best thing. I called my neighbor down the street. She was at our door in 5 minutes.

I have always had good neighbors. Growing up I lived on this amazing street with a ton of kids who had great moms. In elementary school, we’d all be outside,  rollerblading or playing in the creek behind our house. Such fun memories. When we got a little older, Abbey’s family moved in across the street and a sister friendship began that is still going strong today. Her mom became my second mom. And when Shep had his accident my mom ran next door and got a neighbor to keep an eye on Charlotte while we met EMSA. She put her reassuring hands on my shoulders and murmured positive thoughts as I stared down at the paramedics on the floor. Good neighbors are a god-send in times of crisis.

My all time favorite photo of us cul-de-sac girls growing up. I think we all had a copy.
My all time favorite photo of us cul-de-sac girls growing up. I think we all had a copy.

After we got married, Erron and I moved away to Dallas,  and bought a home in Lake Highlands, where we didn’t know anyone. But eventually, I began to realize I lived next to some of the sweetest, most down to earth people in Texas. We had a fun couple across the street with a boy Shep’s age. She and I would spend hours in my front front yard letting our kids play until our husbands pulled up and we remembered we were supposed to feed them dinner. The family right next door was about 10 years ahead of Erron and me. They became our family. I knew these people were the real deal early on when I banged on their door hyperventilating after I had an unfortunate meeting between my ring finger and the electric hedge trimmers. Sara answered the door in the middle of coloring her hair and her sweet husband drove me bawling all the way to the ER. He spent the entire drive trying to console me over the (minor) damage to “my prettiest finger.” (The one with the diamond on it. Obviously.) A few years later their two daughters became stand-in aunts to Shepherd, then later Charlotte. Their mom, Sara,  gave the most practical advice about basically everything. Leaving them left a big hole in my heart.

Now we’re in Edmond, coming up on a year this March. Erron and I are both still getting our footing. We’ve obviously been distracted this year and haven’t fully found our people yet…but we’ve discovered our neighbors. I guess from having such fond memories of growing up around friends, and then knowing what it’s like to not live near family, meeting the people on our street become my mission. As one kind neighbor put it, if we live nearby, I will pursue you, and pretty much make you be friends with me. But there is such comfort in that, especially if you don’t have family in the same town. And as luck would have it, our neighbors here are pretty great too. They have crawled through my doggie door to feed Gus when we were stuck in Children’s Hospital in Tulsa, played in the snow with our kids, and now, shown up for us in the middle of the night. It makes me feel safe and fortunate to live next to people like this.

Erron dreams of living on land someday but I think he underestimates my need for people around me. We’ll have to cross that bridge if and when the time comes. Until then, come on over, bring your kids…and if you need someone to watch your babies in the middle of the night when your emergency happens, you can call me.

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Giving thanks for the Hard.

2 / 13 / 152 / 13 / 15

I was at the IF Local conference this last weekend and met some wonderful women. Smart, sweet, genuine…I loved getting to know their hearts and their stories, they were all so different but they were all wanted the same thing. To be able to believe God is really good, even when it doesn’t feel like it. I came home and told Erron, “I’m so glad we’ve been through what we have, and that we are still young(ish). I’m thankful we’ve had so much hard, so early.” Wait. What? Why would I appreciate the hard? Because. I FINALLY believe he’s good. Even when nothing else is.

For a long time, I didn’t want to have anything to do with hardship or heartache. Besides the obvious reasons for not wanting the hard, I especially didn’t want to be different…and heartache changes who you are. I was afraid that loss or disappointment would make me bitter and tough, a glass half empty kind of girl. I envied girls who’s lives had always just worked out the way they imagined from childhood all the way into motherhood. And in fact, I did become that bitter girl when I had to go back to work after having Shepherd two months early. I was just. so. angry. And a feeling a little bit entitled but that’s a whole different post. I would sit, holding tiny Shep in the rocking chair before school and cry, feeling so stressed out about reading fluency and test scores, which I didn’t really care about anymore, because all I wanted was to  hold my own baby longer. I spent every free thought wracking my brain for a way around the impossible situation that was our need for my income. It sucked, and it was turning me into someone I hated. This was the beginning of an honest dialogue with the Man Upstairs. I was straight ticked, his timing was off, and what did He know about mothering anyway? Jesus was not a mom, getting up in the middle of the night, I’m just saying… It was not my finest moment.

Shep and I heading to work. I was probably making a similar face.
Shep and I heading to work. I was probably making a similar face.

Then I finally figured out it was going to have to be me who adapted. I’d run out of choices. I could be resentful, and joyless, or I could start believing God was a good as he said he was, and start looking for it. So slowly, painfully…my heart began to change and I began to trust. Not long after that, Erron got a new job that allowed me to stay home less than a year later.

When Shep fell in the pool it was surprisingly easy to trust God. It was our ONLY option. We literally had nothing else. I had to believe God was good and his promise was real or I would not have been able to survive those moments. It became harder when I woke up in the middle of the night to see the room empty down the hall in ICU. A girl a little older than Charlotte and been brought in from drowning a few days after Shepherd. They both had very similar scenarios coming in. Looking back, I should have known what was happening…I distinctly remember catching the eyes of her father as we passed each other in the hallway. I knew then, but I wouldn’t admit it. I remember a woman crying, so loudly, the day before. But I blocked it out. When I woke up and saw the empty room I couldn’t deny it anymore. I was devastated, and confused. Why them and and not us? It wasn’t fair. And I wondered for a minute, is He still good? 

During the IF conference I heard incredible stories from the some of women presenting, all of them would make you cry, but the golden thread they all shared was the same. Through their unimaginable pain, they still saw God’s goodness. They feel it now, they say, more than they ever had. I can testify to this. In our darkest hours, I felt God’s presence the strongest. It’s counterintuitive, but it was there. And the morning after that room down the hall was emptied, I came to the same conclusion. I don’t understand all His ways, but He is still GOOD. Not because Shepherd lived. But because God met me in the valley of my grief in the most palpable way. Words cannot describe it. Because days before  Shep fell in I had asked a friend to pray that I could live out my faith in a meaningful way to those closest to me because words didn’t carry enough weight. Because of the love that poured in from people who heard our story. Because the story doesn’t end when we first think it does.

I am different then I was 8 months ago.  But it’s a good different this time. I know there will be more heartache, no one gets off scott-free…but I’m not so scared of it like I used to be. And that’s a freeing place to be.

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Everyday Light v3

2 / 9 / 152 / 9 / 15

 

 

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#EverydayLight is a guest series by Chelsea Ahlgrim Photography with the purpose of helping mommas capture better photos of their family’s memories at home. Be sure to check out the Introduction here and Part One and Part Two. You can also follow along on Instagram and post your own images using the #EverydayLight hashtag!

Hi everyone! It’s our third and final week of tips and tricks for capturing better images of your family at home, and this week we’re pulling out the big guns- or more specifically, your camera. Ready? Here we go.

1. Turn off your flash– I know what you’re thinking- this seems a bit counterintuitive, especially if you’re shooting indoors where you have less light, but just stick with me here. Shooting with a flash can cause overly-bright subjects (“blown out” faces) that lose their detail, and harsh shadows directly behind them. You can also lose much of your background because of the stark contrast caused by using your flash. So go into your camera’s menu settings and turn OFF the flash. Don’t let the camera choose for you on “Auto” either. You’re smarter than your camera, so be sure it’s all the way off. You might even be able to choose this on the Mode dial on the exterior of your camera. Usually it looks like a little lightning bolt arrow with a slash through it. Is it off? Okay, now don’t forget to throw open those windows before you shoot!

DSC_0527 DSC_0003 Vessie in the window-4 January18-3

2. Half-press: this is a little trick I knew nothing about before I started learning about photography. Digital cameras have this cool function where if you press the shutter button halfway down, it focuses on wherever your camera is pointed. Give it a shot. Look through the viewfinder on your camera (or at the LCD screen if yours doesn’t have an eyepiece). Now lightly press the button halfway down and hold it. Did you see and hear it focus? Pressing it the rest of the way down will release your shutter (take the picture). A couple of points: if you’re photographing people, always focus on the eye closest to you; you can also change your focus point by pressing the arrow buttons on your camera (known as toggles) to allow you to compose your shot the way you want.

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3. Set it Up: Okay. Let’s all take a deep breath and just accept that we’re about to learn some techy stuff, kay? At the risk of over-simplifying things, for the purposes of this narrative, “exposure” is how bright or dark your image is. It’s determined by three settings: Aperture, Shutter Speed, and ISO. Here’s my favorite way to explain exposure:

Let’s pretend you’re in a house, and your camera is a window with shutters on it.

APERTURE- this is the size of the window- a bigger window means more light in the room. A smaller window means less light. This number is expressed in F stops. The aperture mantra is, “Smaller number, bigger hole.” Now, there’s a lot more to this, including how much of your background is in focus (known as “depth of field”) I’ll leave that for another time.

aperture jpeg

SHUTTER SPEED- this is how quickly the window’s shutters open and close. The longer they’re left open, the more light can be let into the room. If they open and shut quickly, less light is let into the room. These are expressed in fractions- specifically fractions of a second. The shutter speed mantra is “smaller fraction, faster the shutter.” A faster shutter will freeze your shot, reducing blur.

ISO- Now let’s say you’re wearing sunglasses in the room. This basically desensitizes your eyes to any light that’s being let into the room- like a low ISO. The mantra to remember with ISO is “The lower the light, the higher the number.” So the darker your room is, the higher you’ll need to set your ISO. All of these elements work together and affect each other when they’re altered. But don’t fret. Since we’re all assuming we’re beginners here, I’ve got an easy solution to get you started…

4. Try Aperture Priority: This setting is represented by an “A” on your program settings dial. This allows you to select the aperture (how big or small your “window” opens when you open the shutters) and then chooses the other two elements (shutter speed and ISO) for you. Things that will help you decide where to set your aperture (which F Stop to choose) might be: how fast your subject is moving, how far away from them you are, and how dark or light it is in your location.

So let’s say you’re in your living room. If you’re photographing fast-moving kiddos, and you’re going to be fairly close to them, it’s probably safe to place your aperture at a number between 1.8 and 2.5. This let’s in a fair amount of light when your “window” opens and closes. The camera will choose the other two settings for you. That’s it. Easy peasy, right?   The images below were shot in Aperture priority mode at f/2 in a room with only a single window for light.

DSC_9561-2 DSC_9583-3 DSC_9598-2  Gosh, there’s so much more I want to cover, but I hope that I’ve at least gotten you started. The good news is that I plan to turn all of this information into an eBook that will be expanded upon and available for download on my website! I’ll be sure to make an announcement on here once it’s ready!

In the meantime, if you’d like more information, I’m always happy to answer any questions you might have in the comments section here or on the Prayers for a Pirate Facebook page. You can also find me at chelseaahlgrimphotography.com and on Facebook as Chelsea Ahlgrim Photography. Thank you so much for joining me on this three-part series! I really hope that you took something away from it- even if it was just the urge to take more photos of your messy blessings!

God bless, and happy shooting!

xo,

Chelsea

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A Birthday Party

2 / 4 / 15


DSC_9448-2We celebrated Charlotte this past Saturday with family. It was precious. Lots of pink and hearts. (I so love having her birthday close to Valentine’s day.) Charlotte wore her dance outfit. She was completely bewildered when we sang Happy Birthday to her but managed to blow out her own candle. She received a such fun gifts and the big hits were a pink tent, leg warmers, and a little pink kitchen. Brother was so loving and brought Char each of her presents to open, he was genuinely excited for her. Erron made us all giggle by crawling inside the tent to set it up. It was a sweet celebration and afterward our home was littered with evidence of a good time…tissue paper, and new toys strewn about. Happy memories.

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Everyday Light v2

2 / 2 / 152 / 9 / 15

 

everydaylightdarkheader

#EverydayLight is a guest series by Chelsea Ahlgrim Photography with the purpose of helping mommas capture better photos of their family’s memories at home. Be sure to check out the Introduction here and Part One and Part Two. You can also follow along on Instagram and post your own images using the #EverydayLight hashtag!

Hello again! So, did your mind start spinning with ideas? Did you start wanting to pull out your camera at every opportunity? GOOD! Let’s keep going!

1. Let in the light– If you’re indoors, open up every window you can. Curtains back, shades raised, shutters open. What we’re looking for is a nice soft, indirect light. If you’ve got direct sunlight coming into your windows, it’s best to shoot somewhere in the shadows of that light rather than directly in the sunlight.

DSC_0652 DSC_0021 DSC_0332

DSC_4436 If you’re outside, find some open shade- beside a fence or the house, underneath the playhouse, beneath a tree, etc. Tip: Try shooting with the sun to your subject’s backs (known as backlighting). This makes for beautiful, golden halos of light around your subjects! This is my personal favorite

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2. Take it all in– One of the keys to capturing great lifestyle images is in being able to step back and observe. Let them do their thing. Let them play and get dirty or just sit and read. See it in your mind as an image- or a series of images. Really see it. See where the light makes shadows on her delicate features, and illuminates those soft little hairs on the back of his neck. Notice the details: his dirty feet, your husband’s calloused hands, the sweetest little bow hanging pitifully from your daughter’s only remaining pigtail, the dust rising from the couch when the dog plops down, milky white eggs in a bowl, browning bananas in the kitchen window, lovies worn threadbare from too much love… Begin to see the art in front of you.

DSC_0011-2 DSC_0283 DSC_0602 DSC_0600 DSC_0031 (2)-2 DSC_0345 DSC_0299 DSC_0325 DSC_00033. Get on their level– Kids and pets see life from a completely different perspective. Sit, get on your knees, crouch, or even lay on your stomach so that you can capture their world from their angle. You can also experiment with different angles: standing over them as they play on the floor (or climb on the furniture and shoot downward, as I’ve been known to do), shoot from below them if they’re climbing, or capture their profile or even the back of their head- who says their faces need to show? It all depends on what you’re trying to capture. Is it their facial expressions? Or is it the particular feeling of the moment? You’d be surprised how emotions that can be conveyed just through movement and posture. Let your angle and composition tell the story.

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That’s it for week two, everyone! Next week we’ll FINALLY be pulling out that camera to talk a little more in-depth about settings and functions and lighting and ALLLLL of that crazy stuff. Be sure to come back!

xo,

Chelsea

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About Me

Welcome! I'm Allie. Lover of family and friendship, good books, a good laugh, and telling it like it is. This little space is where I write about healing my heart after almost losing my son to drowning, and also other things I hold dear: mothering, marriage, faith and friendship. Love that you stopped by.

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